LESSONS & BLESSINGS: Once a Cheater, Always a Cheater??

I met this beautiful Goddess years before my human avatar was ready to receive her, but my Ego couldn't allow this Gem to roam free of my last name, any longer. So, I did what a lot of other humans would have done in this situation. I gave her my words, my time, and my love. All while keeping the biggest secret that ended up destroying my very foundation. Selfishly, I opened up one door without properly closing the other. Even though that painted me in the worse light possible, I knew it was necessary for me to experience so I could learn the lessons that I needed before I stepped into my own greatness.

In order to truly heal from this misstep I had to swallow my pride and face my fear to enter the dark side of the moon, in order to see the situation with an eagle eye. I had to stare my "f*ck-up" right between the eyes to truly understand why I allowed this situation to unfold in such a way,  aside from the obvious lack of courage. My answers began unfolding to me like scenes from a horror movie. What appeared was that I didn't know how to stand up for myself. I lived my entire life in somebody else's image with the hopes of receiving the unconditional love that was unaccounted for in my family life. I was shown different situations where I allowed people to continuously place me on a shelf until they were good and ready to play. I recalled scenarios where I forced myself to shape-shift in order to suit the other persons needs over my own. "To hell with my happiness!" I thought. As long as I was loved, that was all that mattered. I became the epitome of less-than, not good enough, and little secrets. Year after year, I unknowingly relinquished my power and gave away all of my heart, Soul, and dignity. Soon enough, my world exploded and I imploded. Jesus Wept. So did I.

As the saying goes, "What goes up, must come down", and vice-versa. My biggest downfall became my greatest triumph. I learned the importance of self-love, self-worth, and I learned to have compassion for myself. I felt the passion and power behind unconditional love for the first time in my life! I even gained the importance of integrity and honor within ALL of my relationships. Most importantly, I learned how to accept and love humanity unconditionally. Hurt people, really do hurt other people, and I lament the hurt that I caused to the people I loved and still love even to this day. I, now,walk forward with my head held high because I am equipped with the tools to learn, forgive, and never repeat.

See you, Royals, On Top!

-YUME

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